I find it interesting how often people communicate with each other but don’t really connect. Communication is transferring words back and forth between two or more parties. The connection that can be made will really make the difference in how effective that time is together.
Let’s look in on a typical company down the street and see how things are doing when it comes to communication…
It is a typical day in that all the people in the office are doing their normal routines. No big fires to put out and not much inner-office turmoil. But that is because the owner is not there. When he comes in, they tend to tense up a little and are more aware of him and what could potentially happen.
Will he be barking out the orders today, expressing his displeasure for a certain client, vendor or teammate, or will he too be in a better mood – like the rest of the team currently is? He is back from his racquetball match and started to talk to the office manager about his morning. “I played someone today that was pretty fast for a big guy.” The office manager seemed to have a puzzled look on her face. – enough of a look that the owner inquired why she looked so puzzled.
The office manager thought about his comment for a second and replied, “I am not sure if you meant to insult him by calling him a big guy, or if you were complementing him for being a fast guy.” The silence between them after she said that seemed to drag on for longer than either one of them cared for. Multiple times, it seemed like he tried to engage in a reply, but every time he tried, his words did not come out. Then after the third attempt, he dropped his shoulders and allowed the comment to sink in.
Then his eyes glimmered with hope! He decided right then and there that he was going to change his thinking, his wording and his thoughts on life. Well, no one can do all that in one minute, but he was able to change his sentence. Proudly, he reworded his original sentence so that it would reflect better on the individual that he was describing.
“I played against someone in racquetball this morning…he was pretty big for a fast guy!”
Choose your words carefully. I was the guy that was described here. Many have told me that I am pretty fast for a big guy. Then one day, someone told me that I was pretty big for a fast guy. The words made me feel better. The label was fast guy, not big guy, and since then it has helped me see things differently. Look around you today and see what words in your life you can modify that will allow the true meaning of your thoughts to come out, and hopefully help someone along the way!